2009-02-18

Taking the Confusion Out of What to Wear

     As the holiday season comes around, many people will begin receiving invitations to holiday parties of all kinds. In some cases, you'll know exactly what is expected of you as far as mode of dress. Let's be honest; your best friend's tree trimming party is easy to dress for, but what about that invitation to your boss' annual New Year's party at the Country Club that says "White Tie Required"? Or, do you know what dress is appropriate for a wedding where the invitation reads "Semi-formal attire is desired"?
 
The Tradition of Dress Codes:
 
      The Dress Codes were created to help people know what was expected of them in a particular setting. It is a function of etiquette, those rules designed to help us interact comfortably with one another. The host of any given function would specify a dress code based on the atmosphere he or she was hoping to create for the event. And as your host or hostess was going to the time and expense of organizing and providing food and entertainment for your enjoyment, it was considered very bad taste to attend dressed inappropriately. The dress code allowed you to know what to wear, and more importantly, what not to wear.
      Therefore, a hostess planning a function that wanted to be elegant and sophisticated could send her invitations and request that her attendees wear "Formal" attire. Doing this, she was assured that no one was likely to show up wearing something to ruin the atmosphere she has worked hard to create, and more importantly, something that would result in the wearer feeling uncomfortable for having chosen.
      If you should ever receive an invitation to a function where there is no dress code suggested, yet you feel it is possible that your host intends for there to be a standard of dress, do not hesitate to call and ask for clarification. Your host will be grateful for your considerate gesture, and you will be much happier when you aren't over-or-underdressed.
 
Modern Adaptations of Dress Codes for Business:
 
      Today, when most people hear the term dress code, they think of school or work and the clothing required for those environments. This is especially true for those persons in corporate environments. Decades ago, we had terms like "Blue collar", "White collar" and "No collar" jobs. "Blue Collar" jobs were those uniformed, labor-intensive, skilled, industrial jobs in machining, fabrication and manufacturing, and were called such because the typical uniforms were blue in color and were all nearly identical regardless of which company you worked for. "No Collar" jobs included unskilled work in retail sales, food service, janitorial service, and general laboring, the "uniforms" for these types of jobs were all varied depending on type of job and where you were employed. And then there were "White Collar" jobs. These were the professional jobs where the workers dressed in suit and tie or at least shirt and tie for lower-level positions.
      "White Collar" jobs today have evolved from the strict "suit and tie" mode of dress and include less formal styles, like "Business Casual" and "California Casual". The Internet Boom and the Dot Com era created a demand for highly-skilled individuals who also tended to be highly-independent and creative. These individuals balked at the "cookie cutter" uniformity of the "Business Dress" environment and companies found that by relaxing the dress codes and adopting more casual attitudes about office attire, they could improve morale and increase productivity.
      All employers will discuss with you their company's policies on office attire and dress codes as part of the interviewing process.
 
Dress Codes in Dining:
 
      Many establishments that serve food and drink strive to create an atmosphere appropriate to their target market - i.e. the kinds of people they wish to serve. Some restaurants don't offer good food, but rather fine dining - indicating that the food may be the star of the show, but the experience of the meal is more than just a "supporting cast". Many places have dress restrictions on specific days or at specific mealtimes. And of course, any given restaurant may have restrictions vastly different from others in the same neighborhood. In the case of resorts and large holiday destinations, there are often restaurants and bars with a wide range of dress codes to allow tourists and guests to select the type of dining environment they want.
      If you're planning an evening out to a fine restaurant, it is a good idea when you phone for your reservations to ask about the establishment's dress code.
 
What The Codes Mean:
 
      Taking into account the three categories of modern life where dress codes come into play, you can easily find yourself facing an amazingly long list of "codes" to decipher. And, as men's and women's fashions are totally different, dress codes mean different things to each gender. Below is a listing of the dress codes you are most likely to encounter in work, dining and social gatherings, where you are likely to see the terms and what they mean for both men and women:
 
Black Tie - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      For men this means wear a tuxedo or please do not attend. A dark or black suit is not 'just as good' for a black tie affair. It is also not a function where you should take liberties with the tuxedo look. Simple, classic tuxedo with black bow tie is exactly what you want.
      For women, black tie means dressing for elegance - preferably long gowns, although a very nice cocktail dress would suit. A black tie affair would be an occasion to visit your hairdresser to have your hair done for the evening. Use jewelry to accent your ensemble.
 
Black Tie Invited - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      For men this means your host would like for you to wear a tuxedo if at all possible, but you will not be turned away without one. However, the option you have is for a dark (black) suit and tie. Nothing that is less formal will be appropriate.
      For women, black tie invited is the same as black tie. Women have more variety in what is available to wear in these situations but should stick with the long gown or nice cocktail-length dress. As with black tie, a trip to the hairdresser is appropriate.
 
Black Tie Optional - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      For men this means that if you would like to wear a tuxedo, you should feel welcome to do so, but your host has no preference and would be happy as long as you wear a dark (black or navy) suit and tie.
      For women, black tie optional is the same as black tie. Women have more variety in what is available to wear in these situations but should stick with the long gown or nice cocktail-length dress. As with black tie, a trip to the hairdresser is appropriate.
 
Business Casual - typically a business clothing term, but also used by some restaurants
      For men, business casual means that wearing a suit and tie to the office is overdressing. Khakis, slacks, button down collars, and maybe a sport coat if you feel you must have one, but wearing a tie is inappropriate. Jeans are not business casual.
      For women, business casual means skirts, pants, blouses and dresses in simple fabrics and comfortable, more conservative styles - something appropriate to the office environment. Jeans are not business casual.
 
California Casual - referring to business attire
      For men and women, California casual means the same thing - anything goes. Jeans are the norm, as are t-shirts and polo-style pullovers. In summer months, shorts and sandals are even acceptable. California casual environments are rare outside of the American west coast, but have gained popularity, especially among companies specializing in software design and other areas of the Information Technology industry. However, even in a California casual environment, you should allow good taste to dictate your choices. Important client meetings and presentations would still call for long pants (even if only jeans) and a shirt with some buttons (even if only a pullover).
 
Casual - seen referring to social gatherings, business and dining
      This environment is very informal. For both men and women, casual attire refers to clothing that is comfortable and appropriate to the setting and the occasion. For a beach party or backyard barbecue jeans, shorts and t-shirts are fine, but for an afternoon wedding you would still be better served with a pair of slacks and button-down shirt, or summer dress.
 
Cocktail Attire - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      For men, cocktail attire means suit and tie, or coat and tie. Colors and fabrics may vary with the season or with the location of the event. (A cocktail party at a friend's place would be a little less dressy than one held in a nice hotel.)
      For women, cocktail attire is the cocktail-length dress. Hair and make-up should be appropriate to the time of day (typically early evening) and the color and fabric of the clothing will likely vary with the season and location of the event.
 
Creative Black Tie - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      This is as formal of an occasion as the other black tie variations, but offers men the option to wear some of the trendier styles of tuxedo. Perhaps he might choose a black tuxedo shirt with a collar stud instead of a bow tie, or a brightly patterned vest or cumberbund.
      For women, there is generally no difference in the creative black tie and other black tie variants, though it does allow for more daring and exotic styles of dresses.
 
Dress Casual - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      Think of dress casual as being the social variant of business casual. For men and women, the main rule of thumb is no jeans, and something slightly more conservative and 'dressier' than your standard business casual attire. For example, men should choose slacks and button up shirts over khakis and pullovers, while women should choose a nice pantsuit over separates.
 
Formal Attire - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      Formal attire follows the same rule as black tie for both men and women, although by not specifying black tie the option is available to be a little more creative if the setting is appropriate. (For example, wearing the tuxedo without a tie, or a woman wearing dressy separates as opposed to a dress.)
 
Informal - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      This environment is the same as casual. Just as with casual attire, informal refers to clothing that is comfortable, but still appropriate to the setting and the occasion.
 
Jacket Preferred - used by restaurants
      Jacket preferred means that the restaurant wants to encourage gentleman patrons to wear jackets when dining in the establishment, although exceptions may be made depending on the situation and time of day. The restaurant may offer loaner jackets or you may be seated in an out of the way area to maintain the atmosphere they desire.
      For women, dresses are always a good choice in this environment.
 
Jacket Required - used by restaurants
      Jacket required means just what it says. Without a jacket, you risk being turned away by the host or hostess. Many restaurants that require a jacket for dining have a stock of loaner jackets for male patrons who are inappropriately attired. However, they will not allow you in without a jacket, so if there is a question of fit, you could have a problem.
      For women, dresses are always a good choice in this environment.
 
Jacket and Tie Required - used by restaurants
      As with the jacket required environment, these establishments require their male patrons to wear both a coat and a tie to dine in. Many will have loaner coats and ties for the ill-prepared, but there is always the issue of fit.
      Again, women are well-served to wear a dress.
 
Semi-Formal Attire - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      Semi-Formal is the toughest of the codes to break. It isn't formal, but a dark suit (in black, navy or dark gray) is needed, and in some cases the invitation or code may call for "dinner jackets" though they are slowly fading from use.
      For women, semi-formal means a nice cocktail-length or long dress and something more elegant for the hairstyle.
 
White Tie - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      White tie is the pinnacle of formal dress. For men it is unwaveringly specific: a tailcoat, white vest, white shirt and white bow tie. Please note: Outside of participating in a wedding party where the choice of tails has been made, the White Tie event is the ONLY acceptable setting to wear a tailcoat, and a tailcoat should only ever be worn with a white tie, shirt and vest. Some men choose to wear tailcoats as part of a "tuxedo" in order to be more "dressy", but the two terms are not interchangeable and neither are the two outfits.
      For women, a white tie affair is the time to pull out all the stops and be as glamorous and sparkling as you can be. Beaded gowns and intricately coiffed hairstyles with your very best jewelry are all called for. It is definitely an occasion to visit the hairdresser and get manicures, facials and pedicures.
 
Ultra-Formal Attire - generally seen referring to social gatherings, and some fine dining
      Ultra-Formal is simply another term for "white tie" and indicates that both men and women dress with the utmost care to be as formal and fashionable as possible.
 
      Now that you know what the codes mean, you should be more than ready to do yourself proud at your next function. And perhaps knowing the different modes of dress will inspire you to use them yourself. Are you planning a holiday party and want to make it a more memorable affair? Try letting your guests know you expect formal dress.
      The wonderful thing about dress codes is that by asking your guests to dress in a specific way, it not only creates a visual atmosphere, but when we dress up we feel differently and therefore act differently. And if you do have a dressy party, consider having someone take pictures, or give disposable cameras as party favors so that your guests can create memories of the evening when everyone looked so nice.
 

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