2009-02-17

How to lose weight without losing your man

If you are like the vast majority of folks, you are probably trying to lose weight and get fit.


Those are great goals, but be forewarned: they will either strengthen or completely do in your relationship. Let's say you are trying to lose weight. Let's take a look at how that goal can either help or help your relationship.


Scenario #1: It strengthens your relationship because your man is one of those really cool dudes who says things like, "Wow you look great. How much have you lost?" and "I know you are trying not to eat sugar, so I've decided not to keep my ice cream out of the house. If I want some, I'll go out for it."


Scenario #2: Your man is the type of person who tries to support you by making comments like, "Don't you think you've already eaten enough?" and "Thank God you've decided to lose weight. It's about time. I don't think your butt could be any bigger."


Gee, thanks. That was helpful.


Here's the thing: you can have scenario #1. It just takes a little communication. Tell him about your goal and then ask him for his help. Suggest he might help you by:


•    Exercising with you. Research shows that people who work out with a buddy tend to work out longer, harder and more consistently.


•    Not keeping tempting foods in the house.


•    Not asking you if you are "in the mood" for any tempting food you are trying not to eat.


•    Not commenting on your eating. Back seat dieting is just as annoying as back seat driving. And, just as back seat driving tends to create the type of anxiety that causes the driver to wrap a car around a tree, back seat dieting usually causes the dieter to stuff 6 cookies in her mouth at once.


•    Complimenting you on how you look—now—even though you have not lost a single pound. People who are more self-confident and have a positive body image tend to stick to diets better than people with a low self-image.


•    Doing more around the house, so you have more time available to exercise, cook healthy meals, and search for new recipes.

Most of our men do not sabotage us on purpose. They really mean well, and they really do want to support us. They just don't know how. If you give him a How to Support Me While I Lose Weight Instruction Manual, though, he'll be much more likely to turn into your biggest dieting fan.

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